This is why such a soul experiences excessive sadness and despair soon as signs of its own lack of integrity show up, with the consequence that it immediately feels unacceptable to God.  That’s why a sick soul is always hiding the truth from itself, the mechanism for which is endless self-justification. And why the correction of such a soul is always taken as rejection.
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On Helping Souls That Are Being Tried
Do not lose your serenity on account of those who are being tried.  Pray for them; offer the sufferings of My Passion and some acts of self-denial, some self-imposed sufferings for them.”
Jesus to Sister Mary of the Holy Trinity
 
When souls are being tried, what they need from you is deeper love of Me—so that, through you, I may give them the grace they need.  So you see, you need your serenity even more at such times.  Do not try to buy peace for souls by losing your own!  Offer up your act of self-denial at such times, so that the soul who is suffering may get the grace to accept in joy what she cannot change—through your free offering of love.  You will see more and more how you are all instruments in the communication of My Love, for one another as for yourselves.  The more you will understand that, the more you will love one another.
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On Feeling Unloved
Only the realization that I love you now, I, Jesus, who know all your misery, all your sins, the failure of your whole life, only the knowledge that I Who know how underserving you are of anyone‘s love, yet love you nevertheless with the Love of God Himself, can take away the pain and anxiety of feeling unloved by so many persons, and not undeservedly.
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 The Age of St. Bernard’s is not like Ours.
St. Bernard, commenting on the Canticle (Song of Songs)

"Or perhaps, drawn away and seduced by his own concupiscence, he is still being dangerously tempted. Such a soul as this does not need a Bridegroom but a Physician, and for this reason receives, not kisses or caresses, surely, but only remedies for wounds in oil and ointments."

Yes, Bernard, in your time this was true — for the time had not yet come to force men willy-nilly from the highways and byways to the wedding feast. Men were still strong and able to overcome concupiscence with a help of the Physician less than the Kiss of His Mouth, less than the embrace of His intimacy. But now we are as children, impatient as we are weak, and needing, therefore, to be fondled and kissed by the Mother and her spouse, by Mary and Jesus.  0 Bernard, those of your age, who could help yourselves, needed the Physician only to supply the ointments of which you speak. But we need the Kiss of this Bridegroom who condescends to the weakness of little ones, like this little one who is too weak to help himself and therefore cries out:
"Let him kiss me with the kiss of his mouth, for thy breasts are better than wine.  For my justification now is not that I am healed by the ointments of the Physician, but that I am in the arms of His Mother, that it is her purity that makes me worthy of His embrace, not my virtue."
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If Something Is Painful
It seems I always assume that if something is painful, it is evil and to be avoided. Then, when I am suffering, I begin to think, and I do not rest until I have discovered some truth which I hope will remove the pain. But I do not think I do this only because I want to avoid suffering: it is rather that I look upon suffering as a sign that I am wrong somehow, that God is displeased with me, and therefore something in me must be changed.
    

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“Wisdom will laugh in the latter day," Scripture tells us, meaning that the Word, and we too, united to the Word, His little words, will laugh the devil to scorn in the knowledge that all his malice has only succeeded in forming us the saints of God.
Well, Wisdom does not have to wait till the latter day, for Wisdom Is, and He has told me that all this evil which Satan shows me in myself is myself, myself without Jesus and Mary, what I would be if I were without Them. And so I laugh, secure in Their arms, because I am not without Them. And therefore the more evil one shows me that I am in his image without Jesus and Mary, the more closely I hold on to Jesus and Mary — and laugh.
For already, in Them, I am in the latter day.
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"He who eats of Me will yet hunger, he who drinks of Me will yet thirst."
And so the part of you that seems to be suffering and torn apart is the part that cannot remain: it must change because it is not yet conformed to Christ; but your superior part, the part which is conformed to Christ in faith, is peaceful.
Now you must not think that there is something wrong in this struggle; On the contrary there would be something wrong if there were not a struggle going on.

When a woman is carrying the unborn baby, it is changing: that is why her time has not yet come, because the baby is not yet ready to be born. Not because a certain interval of time must elapse, merely, but because it takes that interval of time for the fetus to mature. And so the pain you feel is the pain of becoming conformed to Christ in the womb of Mary.
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Whenever we see a weakness in another, that is a sign that Our Lord wants us to love Him in that person. That was why He shows Himself so weak to us in His Passion.
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The reason for temptations, in God's plan, is to show you what you are in yourself. Thus, whether or not you have consented to a temptation, you know enough about yourself that,  from the attractiveness of the temptation, how easy it would be to give consent. What you do then, before and after, is to realize that you are not the Immaculate Conception, and that God does not expect you to be. That is why He gave you a mother, a supernatural one as well as a natural one.

Well, if you look at a book on embryology, you will notice that the early embryo looks something like a pig, or some monster or other. Likewise for the supernatural embryo. Mary is carrying you and through her you will become a saint. But that is what you will become, you do not start out being one.
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0 Sacred Heart of Jesus, through the heart of our
heavenly Mother, I offer a vow of complete abandonment to Thee, to Thy will, in the certainty that Thou wilt think of everything, even to the minutest details.  And I promise Thee complete self-effacement (thoughts, desires, etc.), to attend solely to offering Thee the unceasing act of virginal love, to see
Thee in everything, and to have always a "yes" ready for everything. “O Jesus, I place my trust in Thee!” (Sister Consolata).
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We are creatures of time who live and act in time, and often we get into trouble because we forget that. And so, at this moment I am all absorbed in God and it seems as though nothing could ever take me away from Him. But the next moment something disturbing happens, and it seems as if nothing could ever bring me back to Him. And so, since we live in time, we should not think that making a resolution once, even once a day, even once an hour is enough.

That is what is behind what Jesus taught Consolata, that the act has to be unceasing. But renewing the resolution each hour will serve as a kind of check. That does not mean that you should forget about it from one hour to the next - because the objective is to make it truly unceasing.
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Now I would like to explain a little what this “unceasing” act means. It is this, that Jesus wants to love you – always – but He needs your ACTUAL disposition to be loved in order to love you. And all the things that you do that get you engrossed - anxieties, plans, hurts, hopes, fears, or just wandering thoughts and images, keep your disposition from being actual, so that those are all wasted moments, hours, days, and, in some cases, alas! lives. So you must over so gently, calmly and quietly, keep your heart turned towards Jesus, not necessarily saying words with your lips, or even thinking them, but breathing them, so to speak. And yet, from time to time, we need to say words like “Jesus and Mary, save souls!”. They are, after all, the words of salvation, Jesus Who saves, Mary through whom He saves, and the souls that They save. But this will require careful attention, especially in the beginning, to keep turning away from the thoughts and words that take you away from Jesus.
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What is fine, just as it ought to be, is just the understanding you have at this very moment, because that is just what the Father has sent you, and He knows what you need. It is just like a tiny infant asleep on its mother’s breast, breathing its love with every breath, because it knows it is being loved, safe and secure in its mother’s arms. There is a certain spirit of perfect contentment, which should be cultivated, and it comes from the realization that God is perfectly pleased with you, infinitely more than that  mother looking down with joy into her infant’s eyes.

You have everything, everything you could possibly need as you are in the arms of Mary. Do not be afraid of your sins and your temptations, do not even think of them, just "My Beloved to me, and I to my Beloved Who feedeth among the lilies."

Did you every wonder why He feeds among the lilies? The reason is because the lilies "toil not, neither do they spin; yet Solomon in all his glory was not clad as one of these." Because the beauty of the soul is in receiving everything from the Father in Jesus, as "Mary hath chosen
the best part, which will not be taken away from her."

What does the Father want to see in you? What did He see in His Son when He said: "This is My Beloved Son in Whom I am well pleased." What He saw in His Son was Himself, for this Father communicates His very own Nature to His Son - and He also communicates It to you. The Son has nothing which He has not received from the Father, and you too must have nothing which you have not received from the Father.
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Did you ever stop to ask yourself why Jesus should have exhorted us to "Be ye perfect as the heavenly Father is perfect."? 
Why did Jesus say “as the heavenly Father”? Because it is this Father Who gives us Himself, Who makes us to His Image, the Image which is Jesus Christ our Lord. And so this heavenly Father wants to communicate Himself to you, and He permits your weaknesses and miseries to be known to you so that you might be disposed to receive Him. But if you do not go to Him, then you are trying to rid yourself of your miseries by yourself.
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